Every shop has a core customer, an ideal woman they design their clothes and brand for. Sometimes, though, that woman just isn’t you. The question remains: Why do you still buy from them?
How can you tell? It is not an immediate feeling, you shouldn't know the brand is not for you. It’s a feeling that comes much much later, when you end up with items in your wardrobe, that instead of feeling fresh, modern, and like your best self, feel like something feels a bit... off. It’s almost like the clothes are wearing you, not the other way around. When that happens, it’s a sign that the brand’s vision has not quite aligned with your own vibe.
Here’s the goal: Avoid buying things that make you look or feel older than you are
The right clothes should elevate your energy, not dull it.
Now, let’s take a moment to chat about the flip sides of shopping: compulsive buying and not wanting to shop at all. Both extremes are pretty common.
Compulsive shopping
Tends to get a bad reputation, but what if we flipped the script? Imagine a scenario where being compulsive is actually paired with successful purchases. I like to call this compulsive shopping with knowledge.
In this scenario, you’re being compulsive because you know yourself so well—your style, your body, your vibe—that you can afford to be impulsive, intentionally. You know what suits you, what makes you feel fabulous, and because of that, you use everything you buy. It’s shopping with purpose and precision, where your so-called compulsiveness is actually a superpower.
On the other end of the spectrum, we have women who...
Don’t enjoy shopping at all.
And honestly, that’s completely valid.
Understanding both ends of this spectrum is key. Whether you’re a confident, compulsive shopper who knows exactly what you’re doing or someone who finds the whole process a bit daunting, it all comes down to knowing yourself. The goal, after all, is to curate a wardrobe that feels like you, whether you’re shopping with intention or choosing to step back from the retail noise.
Take my client Tina, for example. When I met Tina, her career was on the rise, and she realised it was time for her wardrobe to reflect her evolving personality and professional progress. She knew she needed to align what she wore with whom she was becoming, so she invited me to take a look at her style and help her bring it into cohesiveness with her corporate life while keeping a modern edge.
There was just one catch: Tina didn’t like shopping or trying on clothes.
When it comes to understanding why some women aren't keen on shopping, it's crucial to recognise that the experience can often feel overwhelming rather than enjoyable.
Here are some general questions about shopping that came up when we had a chat.
· Where do I start? Do I just buy whatever catches my eye?
· Which items do I search for? Basics, colours? Plain black?
· There are so many styles, how do I know what is right for me?
· Do I just try the colours I like or the colours that are supposed to suit me?
· Do I buy what is there beautifully put as a collection in a rail and be done with it?
She is not alone, These questions arise for several reasons, Let’s hear some of them:
1- Overabundance of Choices:
Walking into a store and being bombarded with racks upon racks of clothing can be intimidating. I mean, where do you start?
It’s like trying to find a needle in a haystack, and sometimes, it’s easier to just walk away than to sift through it all.
2- Lack of time:
In today’s fast-paced world, time is a precious commodity. Many women simply don’t have the luxury of spending hours at the shops browsing through clothes, let alone trying things on. Between work, family and other commitments, there just isn’t enough time in the day to dedicate to shopping.
3- Fit and Body Image Concerns: Finding clothes that fit well and flatter your body can be a real challenge. It’s disheartening to try on item after item only to have them not fit properly or look unflattering. This can lead to frustration and a desire to avoid shopping altogether.
4- Which shops to go to anyway?
This factor is majorly overlooked, as we tend to go to the same shops all the time. However, every shop has a core customer and more often than not, women are buying in shops they are not the core customer for!
5- Concern to get it wrong and end up “detoxing” in a few months.
The horrid of the word “detox”. This is a real concern of buying something, thinking it was right for you, to end up not using it enough and leaving it forgotten for different reasons: Style, colour, fit, fabric.
6- The constant bombardment of new fashion trends and "must-have" items
It can be incredibly overwhelming, especially for someone who doesn't enjoy shopping.
One word: Strategy.
In a fast-paced world filled with fast fashion and endless information, having a strategy is essential. The questions and concerns Tina raised are incredibly common, and without a plan, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed by the options.
Together we crafted a strategy—a personalized plan that allowed Tina to shop and dress effortlessly. This strategy required her to try things on in her own space, where she had the advantage of natural light, a comfortable environment, and all her existing clothes nearby to compare with the new items.
By doing fittings at home, our strategy provided her with a clear view of what worked and what didn’t. It took the stress out of shopping and helped her make confident choices that truly fit her style and needs.
This strategy led to a beautiful (and colourful!) collection that perfectly suited Tina’s new professional life.
It made the entire process enjoyable for her, helping her feel powerful and confident at work while staying true to herself every step of the way.
No matter which shopping experience you prefer, being prepared and understanding what works best for you are the keys to a successful shopping trip.
Hop in with m e for three weeks, three sessions for an intimate coaching group of 10 women, who I will walked through the areas to focus on, in order to create your own strategy.
Happy shopping!
Raquel
Comments